Sunday, January 6, 2013

It's a New Year

Wow what happened to uploading pictures from your computer? No more? This may end my blogging career dismal as it is.( THANKS Elizabeth it is internet Explorer! Weird!)

I spent Friday in the ER with chest pain, not just chest pain but left arm, tight jaw, grabbing pinching chest pain. I thought I had a widow maker going on. It had to be bad to get me to go to the ER. I really hate going to the ER. We waited 3 and 1/2 hours after my normal EKG to be seen. That is a long time to sit and wait when your chest is being crushed with major pain. I was surrounded by horrible coughing and could only imagine the room full of GERMS that I was sitting in.
I was expecting to be discharged since they couldn't find anything wrong with me. Instead I spent the night in the chest pain observation unit. Even with morphine, Valium, and nitro, I really didn't get any relief or sleep until 6:30 in the morning and then it was time to get up and go do the heart stress test!
Now you will have to imagine this part.
Because of my Achilles tendon finally getting healed I asked if I could do the test in my cowgirl boots. Those are the best shoes I have ever worn. They fit my feet so perfectly and give a lot of

I did the test dressed in two big green patient gowns, one covered the front and one covered the back; and my very hip boots! That was a first for everybody. My feet did not hurt and I did the test well. Felt like I was going to faint from all the morphine and no sleep, but I do believe I can start walking again and that is a very wonderful idea!

I still have chest pain. My plan is to do the Daniel fast for the next 3 weeks maybe longer. Get some weight off, get my bad cholesterol numbers down, and keep on truckin. That's the way I roll, just keep on going.

This is going to be a year of change. The first change is the fast that I just mentioned. The next change and a big one is that Roman is going to a new home. it breaks my heart but I need to think about him too. He is a very big dog not to ever be walked or exercised. He is also an expensive big dog. i haven't been able to keep up with expenses like heart worm meds. A woman that comes to my Bible study has a beautiful home on a lake with 4 great kids and the littlest 6 year old girl is madly in love with Roman, they want him.  The oldest son wants a dog to run with. They all exercise and he will be in the house with everybody and LOVED. He will be fine. It will take me awhile to get over this. They are building a fenced in area for the yard and this has been a slow process. We will go over a couple more times so he is really comfortable over there. He loves all of them.  I was thinking about it on Friday and told my husband it was breaking my heart, and then realized it was real chest pain.

We don't know where we are going to be at the end of this year, but like I said this is the year of change. We are making big decisions about down sizing. We will offer the house for sale in the spring when the garden is the most beautiful. For now I am keeping Sammy, I can only take so much. It is a possibility that he may follow Roman and go to the same family down the road if it looks like we will need to be somewhere we can't have dogs. Sam is much smaller at 40 pounds I can train him to walk with me. Roman is so strong and he is magnificent at 70 pounds. We went to visit and the son took him for a run around the lake just like that. It was beautiful to watch.  Since these are friends I can see him and bring Sammy over for a play day. That's not so bad.

Just thinking about going through this house and packing, sorting, keeping, selling, giving, makes me about come unglued. What a job! It's only taken 10 years to get it all organized and sorted and put away! Our plan is to have a much smaller mortgage or no mortgage. We are listening to God for guidance and direction. I wish we could just go somewhere else cooler, but that is probably not going to happen. I am so happy to have a fire in the fireplace and actually use blankets! It finally cooled off here. This is actually when I like MS most. We have sunshine and crisp cold air. It has been raining a lot, which makes messy muddy dogs but that is life!

I was really busy preparing for Christmas this year. I made 6 aprons loved all of them. Ended up too busy to even take pictures of them all but two. It was great to give home made things and bake cookies. We made a lot of butter cookies,( could that be a factor in the chest pain? ya think?) and pumpkin bread with pecans all kinds of delicious treats. I was so much more relaxed. I ordered a few gifts online for the Little's in Cali and did not even set foot in a mall for the entire month of December!

Guess what? The world did not end! I felt like a Who down in Whoville when the Grinch stole their Christmas and they sang anyway!!! My Grinch heart grew this year! Christmas came even better, more dearer, with the old celebrations of music, food, friends, laughter, and something home made. We enjoyed it so much more. I am not dreading the bills. I actually have a few more aprons to make when I get to them.

One special part of Christmas for me this year involved a family of friends that has 7 children. They love stuffed animals. I was wishing I could give them some new stuffed animals and knew that I would not. While visiting they brought out a big pile of their beloved toys that looked like a flock of velveteen rabbits. Missing ears, worn off noses, large rips with worn stuffing coming out, tails hanging by a thread and noses as well. The children asked me to take their animals to my "hospital," and fix them up. I really had to smile because God orchestrated all of this. They didn't know my wish, and I didn't know I ran a hospital for toys!  As I re stuffed, and stitched I thought about how God does this for us. He takes us just as we are, worn from life, worn from being loved and the things that have ripped at us, and he very lovingly gives us a new heart, and begins to mend and repair, to bring us hope and new life. It was so beautiful these thoughts, as I restored these loved toys. I also got to give a gift to the children that only cost me my time and a few tears, and for them the animals they already loved so much.

These are the kinds of adventures I hope the Lord gives me as we go into 2013. We may not live in the same house or have the same pets, but there will be new people, new experiences and new opportunities to show love; might as well get excited!


Elizabeth said...

Are you using Internet Explorer? It is not blogger it is internet explorer that does not allow you to upload pictures from your computer. Download Mozilla Firefox and keep blogging! :)

Kat said...

This post is just so filled of sweetness and goodness, it puts a lump in my throat.
It seems to be that the chest pain was probably caused by stress. Downsizing, giving up your beloved pooch, etc., is all pretty stressful. But you are listening to God and so we know that everything will turn out just as it should.

Continued prayers and blessings for you and your family!

Michelle said...

Change is very difficult. I am sorry that you had to give up your dog, but also feel like you made an intelligent decision. Prayers for your health and the year ahead.

Jeanie said...

I hope you continue to feel much better and get the care you need. I know giving up Roman is a very hard thing but it sounds like it is a very good decision for him and for you.
Best wishes for positive outcomes to all the changes coming up for you in the new year.

Chris H said...

I have been having issues getting photos from my computer to upload onto my blog too.
I have been putting my photos on Picasa THEN uploading them from there to my blog... it's a roundabout way, but it works for now.
I am sure you will feel better about Roman once he is re-homed. You are doing what is best for him. We all have to make such hard choices sometimes.
We re-homed our gorgeous golden retreiver when we moved up here to Auckland.

I hope this year is a good one for you, and the changes you plan on making work out well.

Jensamom23 said...

Praying that your changes this year will bring you only happiness.

Heather said...

Wow I am so sorry to hear you are not feeling well, I will be praying for you ok. The change must be bittersweet but I am excited for you!! God is going to do good things ..when you sell your house I think you should come visit me and soak up the california sunshine the fresh air would be so good for you!! That is a bummer about Roman he is a big boy and they do need to get exercise. Lucy is small she is only 45 pounds must be because she is a girl poodle. Bear is really big though. Well I hope this little note finds you feeling a little better. Try to get fresh air, drink lots of water, and try to get moving some it doesn't have to be an intense heart pumping workout just a short walk some light movement, would be great for you. ~Take Care Love Heather

Mental P Mama said...

I am sending you nothing but light. Roman will be happy there, and you can see him. I am the queen of downsizing and change. While the thought of it is harrowing, the reality is that you will feel free and light when it is done. I promise. Hugs, and take care of yourself! No wheat or sugar!

Elysa said...

I love this. I am going to share it with my sister-in-law as she is experiencing many of the same kind of changes and feelings.

And btw, I really, really do appreciate you being the fixer-up of my kids stuffed critters. That is definitely an area I stink at!

LOVE YOU and praying!!!

Bluebird49 said...

Lovely post, dear friend!