Thursday, October 30, 2008

Your Right

Today I made a big girl decision. Quit whining and be patient, just learn the job. I hate not being an expert. I like to be large and in charge! I'm so out of my comfort zone but in the long run it will be good to get stretched. It's not easy but usually good things are not.

The Piggie made a comment about NORDSTROM'S. Sometimes I suffer being here. Reminding me about my FAVORITE store is enough to make me sit down and cry. Really is there any place like Nordy's? I could do ads for them. I love the piano music, the cafe up stairs where we ate lunch and drank the most delicious coffee. They sell killer chocolate cookies. Now I'm warming up to the subject. The clearance racks have the best deals, I got a fabulous full length teal gabardine coat for $40 off that rack, those days I was a size 6. We went from Macy's to Nordy's and shopped till we couldn't take another step. That is exactly where the sales ladies DO help you buy clothes. They would actually tell you if something looked bad and just keep hunting until you found something wonderful. Their sales are so good they really are a wonderful place to shop. Twice a year they have a major shoe clearance sale that was just plain a shoe feasting frenzy.
I found some of the most beautiful designer shoes,....I need to come to California. I really really need to come to California.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Help I'm Going Crazy!

My new job is driving me nuts. It's actually a short walk. I have never had such an up and down start anywhere. This week we have basically walked through every hall in every local hospital trying to drum up business. I made a big boo boo today and was informed of the rules at one such facility. I was embarrassed to death, even though they were very nice about it. I almost resigned and then didn't.

Sometimes when I'm in a dilemma I make a pro and con list. You get to help because I'm just going to start and not even try and sort it out. Please help.

Things I like.
I like the other liaisons I work with, pretty much most of the staff is fine.
I like not working weekends or nights.
It's fun to wear clothes and dress up, but I do miss my running shoes.
There is some down time in this job so it doesn't kill me physically.

Things I don't like.
Flying by the seat of my pants, we had a week of training and are just "out there."
Confusing job role.
Talking about people in terms of business.
The up and down, yes and no, hurry up and slow down, stressful!
Not feeling productive with unclear goals for the day. I'm actually supposed to have a weekly goal plan and I can hardly figure out a daily one.

I actually thought my "don't like" list was going to be longer than that. I can't really think of anything concrete right now. I thought I would start looking for a regular nursing job just in case but hang in there a bit longer. I should at least pay for the clothes I've bought.

I sure wish I could figure out what size pants I wear. What ever happened to nice sales ladies that looked you over and brought you your size. I love those women. I like them to just bring me outfits and tell me what to put on. Especially this whole business thing. I don't dress conservatively. I'm not into letting 53 year old cleavage hang out (I know you are grateful) but I like to be comfortable and wear denim and corduroy, flip flops, you know an old hippie.
I'm too fat to wear cute dresses and short waisted. I like long skirts and hate nylons so mostly I have been wearing pants and sweaters, a few jackets; very ordinary. BUT I know that even when your too fat the right clothes can make you look good and I need some pants! The crazy thing is everything I have been trying on is 20 inches too long, too tight, too low at the waist, too tight in the crotch, and just plain weird. I honestly cannot figure out what size I am. These cuts are so different. Are there any choices other than hip huggers? When I was young I loved those, and they looked great; however they DO NOT look great now, they look sick.
Not good "sick" either.

So here I am. Keep the job or go back to regular shift nurse work and what size pants. I am very grateful to have arms, and legs that wear pants isn't Nick amazing? Course if I quit this I get back into scrubs and those are easy.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Just Life

I woke up at 7:15 this morning. HELLLOOOO it's Saturday and I had my heart set on sleeping in; you call that sleeping in? So I stayed in bed, with my laptop, until after 10.

Reading makes me think. That's why we read isn't it? To get the cobwebs out of our heads, and off of ourselves; and into the world of ideas.

I was thinking about the world as we know it, the election, and the economy. I was wishing I could live somewhere "cheaper" where my income would magically eliminate my need for an 8 to 5 job. 5 days of a 7 day week is a whole lot of living to give for money. I really am grateful to have a job don't get me wrong. The question is more one of lifestyle and spending. I could live in some places in this country on my hunny's little check. But we are not there, wherever "there" is. "There" is like "they", it's a mythical imaginary someplace and someone. We are here.
We live like we do, we spend too much, we waste our time. We are just like everybody else, getting up every day and going through the schedules that are in motion.

So what do we do with this one life that we have to live? I used to dream of big things. Big like running an orphanage or being like Mother Teresa. You know heroic ideas of achieving great things. Little by little God has been teaching me differently. It's about the little daily things.
If we look at each day as a divine appointment, each person we meet as somebody we are meant to touch; it makes the ordinary disappear. If we ask God, why this person? What out of this encounter am I supposed to give or receive? Then these 40 hour work weeks change. When we can focus on what it is we are to do right here, in this place and the real waking hours of life, our frustrations with where we are not, diminish. At least this works for me, when I remember to do it.

I find myself wishing that I would have listened to my husband and become debt free. We are not in a huge amount of debt, but this is a good time not to have any.
The world is on a precarious brink. Things may change in the near future in a way we could never imagine.
When people flagrantly disobey God and reject him he let's them go into captivity. Are we about there? When I see how people can be so blind to truth, to have what they want, I get scared.
But God, who will be with me, regardless of what may come. In the back of my mind I think, well there is always Colombia. If the world as I know it and my life falls apart from political and economic chaos; I could go to Colombia and just stay there.

I wonder how long I would last. Me with my whimpy self. How quickly would I be sick? How quickly would disaster happen? Isn't it funny how fearful we can be? If I look at the truth, of what really is, I am not so whimpy. God has trained me how to handle pain. I live with daily pain. I have learned the best way to deal with pain is to just feel it, and not react to it. It is there, it is what it is, it isn't pleasant and we wish it would leave. If I evaluate it in my mind it is tolerable as long as I am not crying. I know that a lot of people out there also have this battle with daily pain and it beats them. Bodies will still go if they hurt. Bodies can still do, it is a mind over the pain battle; to a point. But those who win do fight it.

One of the times my back was hurt I fell down the stairs and broke my wrist. I didn't even care. I didn't feel the wrist. I was protesting as the doctor x rayed my wrist and casted it. I kept telling him that my BACK hurt, who cares about a stupid little broken bone? When my ankle broke in thin air with a stress fracture that was altogether different. I felt it breaking. That I worked for another 2 weeks on it before getting a boot, is another. Most days the truth is I could stay in bed for the whole day. I could take pain meds around the clock. All of my muscles and most of my joints hurt, constantly. So I have a choice. Do I live? Do I get up and put the foot that hurts down and feel the stabbing in it, and move the knees that don't want to move and work the kinks out with momentum,, or just stay still? I chose to move. I chose to live and not let pain beat me. There are too many divine appointments out there in the world, to keep. Life is not about me. When we can rise above our circumstances we embrace God's power. That's amazing grace. Life doesn't change, suffering doesn't stop, and we have victory in spite of it!

Please understand that I do not say these things arrogantly. I have seen real pain. I have watched a lot of people die. Cancer is something that can be fought for only so long, and then it does win. I just have chronic pain. My body is not being destroyed with the ravages of a disease. But even then those people who don't surrender live longer, and with a stronger countenance.

Each of us has to find our way and win our own battles. I think I am reflecting today thinking about Lisa, and Kelly's post about our friend. How does someone loose everything until death is the only answer? It's so sad. Even sadder is we let her drop out of life and didn't notice. All of us who knew Lisa have in common that we hadn't seen her in years. My prayer today is that God will take my eyes off of me, and bring to my heart and mind whoever may be forgotten.

It's Saturday a day off. A day usually consumed by chores and all the stuff that didn't get done during the week. Today I am going to take a real day off. I am going to pray for those I know who are suffering. I am going to give thanks for all I have been given. I'm going to watch and see what God is already doing and see if I can join Him. These thoughts make life worth the struggle to keep on keeping on.

Friday, October 24, 2008

Making Dinner

It's Friday and I am so grateful to have made it through another week. My new job is a huge, humongous challenge. After 3 weeks I am still trying to figure it out. They say we are pretty quick but I have never felt more slow. Knowing that the alarm clock is NOT going off at 6:30 tomorrow is pure freedom. The freedom to stay up late and read blogs!

I read several tonight about children. I am not sure what triggers memories in us, I just know that the older I get (and really I am not very old; which is in itself rather worrisome) the easier it is to remember the past and the harder it is to remember what happened yesterday.

Most of the time I just don't think about my daughter. It's too hard and too sad. My daughter is bi polar and an alcoholic and a crack addict. She is also funny and winsome, beautiful and charming, talented and creative; and she is my only child. Her children became my children and have their place. I love them. Sometimes when I see a photo of a sleeping child or read the antics of a two year old my mind goes back. To the days when my daughter was a child and an imp full of mischief. When her blue eyes and pink cheeks filled my vision, because she was all I had eyes for in those moments, the little cherub.

I was a stupid selfish mother. I'm not sure that I could have been anything else, I was 16 when she was born. Let me get up on the soap box and say there are no MATURE sixteen year olds. Kids are not ready to be parents, a lot of them still need skid mark lessons for themselves much less change a tiny diaper.

My conflict was my loneliness, which positioned itself into direct conflict with her needs. I chose me , and she would cry. Heartless and selfish I would walk away and forget, She would grow up and the ways she took revenge were so precise. She let me know she had kept score. Even made up things that weren't true.

I have drifted far away from where I wanted to begin, I wanted to tell you about my baby when she was 3. She was fascinated with glamour at 3. She loved it when my mom curled her hair.
She loved Texas. Her Nana had a mirror tray full of perfumes and she got to smell them all. She loved perfumes. I had quite a collection of it in my house, Her dad had bought it for me for gifts.
It was nice, it wasn't cheap. But how weird was that to give a young teen expensive perfume? I liked to party and have fun. It was the Bunserellie who loved all foo foo smells.

One day I came into the house and it was too quiet. Jen had a seriously cute bedroom. I painted the walls light yellow. She had a water bed, and beautiful long book shelves for all her treasures.
Everything had a place there,which she mostly ignored. I'd get busy and put it all away; big mistake; did we say huge yet?

Jenny was in her room and she was very quiet, this is a bad sign for a three year old. It means mom your in deep doo doo here, very deep. I slowly opened the door and saw all the cereal crushed together in a big pot, a pressure cooker to be exact. She had then added all the bottles of perfume to the dry mixture and was happily stirring her creation.

Why do we react without thinking? I went into my immediate mom roll. I told her she was naughty and she was in big trouble for getting into all the stuff and making such a big mess. Big trouble always meant getting it with a wooden spoon. So here we are, this little three year old bawling and crying, and me the big person carrying the big spoon to paddle her with. My mom spanked for every infarction. Somebody had to teach that girl not to ruin hundreds of dollars of perfume. I didn't like perfume,didn't wear perfume, and somehow spanking my child for playing with something that I didn't even like didn't make sense to me, but I was the mom and I had a duty to teach her what was right so she sorta got pattled. She had worse, but she was so upset she was nearly hysterical and just weeping.

My little tow headed 3 year old and looked up at me with crocodile tears streaming down her face. She was trying to talk and snuffle sniff at the same time, and she was obviously very upset.
She looked up at me with cheeks like a cherub and sobbed," Buuuuuuuttttttt Maaaaammmmmaaaa I was cookin dinner for you; don't it smell good? snif snuffle sob.

Have you ever shrunk where no rock can hide you? I busted out bawlin and called my mama. She was a little comfort, not much, because she thought it was a funny story.

Jenny and I sat down on the floor and she showed me what she was thinking, if you put all your favorites in a pot and then pour the best smelling things on them they will be good.
I asked her if she had tried to eat some. Not yet, and the happy little experimenter was anticipating the delicious surprise. Only a little taste, it might be weird. She took a bit and started spewing all over, caterwauling about her ruined dinner. It tastes just terrible momma,
how can anything smell that good taste that bad? Maybe because it wasn't made to be food,
but it was me that learned a lesson.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Wacky Wonders Wednesday

There are a lot of serious issues going on in the world today. I know, you are just so underwhelmed with the obvious understatement of that statement. Being Queen of stating the obvious I am wondering why some of the questions I have; are never dealt with. If you have an answer please let me in on it.

1. Why do cats come in the house to use a cat box?

2. Where do socks go when they don't come out of the dryer?

3. How can McDonald's run out of hamburger buns, straws, chicken, ketchup, or ANYTHING else for that matter?

4. Who is "they"?

5. When did wrong become right? And right become wrong?

6. How do you have a CHRISTmas party without any "religious themes"?

Any other questions?

Monday, October 20, 2008

I'm Gonna Blog Tonite!

The weekend was great, there is just no better way than the way TONY does it. GGGGGGRRRRREEEEEAAAATTTE! Baby came to visit and had to get snuggled and sugared by everybody. An enchanted moment with Piglet.

However the star was not the baby, or the piglet or even the newly planted cabbages; it was Tigger's 18th BIRTHDAY! We had a party, a party, and it was fun, for reals.

Tigger was so happy and then huge surprise; COFFEE BEAN is actually there at her party, like a famous person, it was. Tigger's eyes nearly bugged out to have the authentic real life Coffee Bean at her party.

I enjoyed it too even if the last few guests made their way home at nearly one AM, as in the next morning!
Did I mention the party was on Sunday? The entire afternoon, evening, night and into the wee hours of the morning. Going to work today was a real picnic. Leaving CB here to have a nice leisurely morning and good visit with my husband who would give me the bottom line version in 30 seconds or less, was depressing. I wanta stay home too!

The Bean was in good form! We shared poo stories, the long detailed version of the bus blowout, and pee stories, and weird boy friend stories. Another friend joined us. We realized during the course of the evening that one of us couldn't see well. One of us couldn't speak well and one of us was deaf as a post. We were an inspirational photo op!

We had FOOD, dessert, presents and I got Tigger a new digital camera. It has an anti shake feature which will really come in handy when I borrow it. She bought an 8 giga byte memory chip for it today. STINKIN COOL KID! That aughta be enough for everybody to get some snappers.

Coffee Bean loved my room, my bed, my lamps, my sheets, my quilts, my paint job,and my very cool and groovy big candlesticks. She is so affirming. Whatta a gal she even let the kitty spend the night with her. Ya'll we had a blast. I wish she was still around here.

Tigger had so much fun she is still floating around happy today. For a teenager to get that happy, is stinkin cool!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008


Today was a good day at work. I'm actually liking EVERYBODY, and starting to work by myself. Once I get the hang of this I think it'll be fine.
My kitty is healing and she looks good. She is luvin livin upstairs with me. She has her own box and bowls of food.
My peanut got over her stomach troubles, it cracks me up that these full grown kids still go get the bucket to barf in; trained them right didn't I?
I still have soem work to do so will sign off for now.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Are You Feeling Stressed?

My oldest is walking around with a bucket to barf in, she's whining, the other one is grumpy and planning a birthday party for 20 people on Sunday, but she hasn't even mailed out half her invitations. My hurt kitty has found the best revenge is to sweetly wake me


by walking all over me and purring,several times a night. I could go on but then maybe I better not. Maybe I should get a grip, like right now. It is getting close to Halloween and things happen then. You see thing you don't want to see; like little men in white coats......

So is this guy. Sometimes I feel like that, and if it's not that bad there is this suggestion .

or if your feeling on the edge and also reminiscing from the past,..

and then to celebrate the ghoolie side of the month,...

the movie was Arsenic and Old Lace, actually quite good.

It worked I am now calm again.

and if you need to celebrate even more head over to ADULT DEPRIVED, she is on my blog roll and is having a very fine....that's it, that's all, go see for yourself you fiend! there coming to take me away hhaahhoo bwahaha.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Pay It Forward

Have you ever seen the movie Pay It Forward with Haley Joel Osment?
A young boy attempts to make the world a better place after his teacher
gives him that chance. It is an excellent movie, well worth watching.
My friend Kris over at had a contest in September
based on the idea from this movie and I thought it was such a great idea
that I am participating here. It started with Peach at Silence Is Broken.
My first reaction was I don't have time!
Then I thought--wait a second--yes I do. We all do if it's important enough to us, right?

HERE ARE THE RULES: The exchange focuses on doing an act of kindness
without expecting anything in return other than that the recipient will, in
their turn, pass the kindness along and pay it forward in their own way.
This is how it works... I am going to agree to send something fun, cute,
& nice to the first 3 blog owners who post a comment on this entry. In turn,
those three will post this information and pick 3 people they want to send
something to and so on. If you are interested in participating, be one of the
first 3 blog owners to leave a comment!
The little something you send can be something you made, bought, were
given or found. No biggie, just a gift that will make the person smile. Maybe
something unique from where you live? There are no cost restraints, but
don't go crazy! If you'd like to join in, be one of the first 3 people to leave
me a comment. You have to promise that you will then post about this on
your blog, link to me, and then send something to the first three people
who sign up to play along through your blog.
If I don't get 3 blog owners that want to participate I would like to send
something to 3 people that leave a comment even if you don't own a blog--so
leave a comment with some sort of way to contact you and who knows what
lovely things may show up for you from Mississippi to make you smile...
In return I ask that you Pay It Forward to 3 other people in some way.
It doesn't have to involve money; there are untold ways to help others
every single day, everywhere you go; just look around.
Oh, and if you haven't seen the movie--I suggest you rent it tonight.
You'll be glad you did.

Post copied and edited from Ladies of the House.

Friday, October 10, 2008

Finally It's Friday

The truth is I have never heard of a Clinical Liasion. The description sounded so fancy I knew it would be away from any situations that might require a disclaimer. The funny thing is I am so careful about my wording; you know I am trained to be GRAPHIC. I think everything I've written about is so sugar coated. There are no descriptions of oder, or blood loss, or wound drainage. Geez ya'll are squeamish. So no up date on my poor little cat but instead some thoughts about our health care situation as a country. You can breathe now, no graphics in this post; however to me these contents are much more disturbing. But please read on, inquiring minds should know.

After a week, I am almost as confused as when I started. Each person there has their has own take on what we should do and when, all tweeked just enough that I could start drooling. I can't figure out why I feel so befuddled. It's like they are speaking an entirely new language, and actually for me it is. Trying to understand insurance, medicare, and medicaid, is a cotton pickin nightmare. What is OK, what will reimburse, and who, how sick, rehab potential, where are they going after us, how many are allowed from this hospital, calling on people by trying to just run into them in the halls, etc... etc...etc... Then understanding which situations we cannot help, but doing all the paperwork anyway just for the "numbers," and which does not credit me with anything. I think I have gone to a government created pit of hell. Talk about confusing!! But I have learned a couple of things. First of all ALWAYS get part B on your medicare, this is not negotiable. In the paperwork from Social Security it is completely unclear in ordinary language ,what "A" is for, and what "B" is for. Would you like to know in plain English? "A" pays the hospital, and "B" pays the doctors. You can have all the insurance in the world and not be able to get care if you can't pay the doctors. The insurance companies have ways out of everything, it is really getting bad when MEDI CARE reimburses better than anybody else! They are so stinkin regulated that some people just fall through the cracks and there is no where for them to go. Seriously it is a major problem! For example; an elderly woman falls at home. She hurts her spine high up in the cervical area, but not an actual broken neck. She requires a ventilator to breathe because of the injury and she cannot get off of it. She is however ALERT and AWARE! She was healthy, she is not really sick, but she cannot breathe on her own. Because she is not SICK, no other facility can accept her. Nursing homes do not take ventilator patients, trach patients, or acute patients so basically this patient is condemned to spend the rest of her life in the ICU. Eventually she will get some kind of super infection and die there. How seriously wrong is that?

Another situation involved an illegal immigrant who claimed he had no place to go and no family. There was no acceptable place to discharge so this patient lived in the hospital, had three meals a day, maid service, personal care, and of course medical care, for NINE months. Finally the social workers made arrangements for discharge to a shelter. the day of discharge the patient had a family member come pick him up and take him to their home. The hospital has no recourse because they were illegal. The hospital and MD's will be out of pocket on that one case, in the millions of dollars. People do you see why this job has my head in a spin? Does anyone know what is going on? I am breathing, I have a heartbeat, so why do I keep thinking I am in some governmental hell? We have regulated and ruled, and set guidelines, until we are absolutely hog tied. It doesn't make any sense.

Government and the law has made this mess so if we go whole hog for social medicine what happens next? Besides the fact that we are going broke, bust, and belly up, we have placed ourselves in the precarious position of not being able to do the right thing for people. It's a maze.
A red tape, regulated maze. A regular rat trap.

So it's Friday and on top of all of this confusion and spin, I have no idea why God wants me there. In fact I am asking him if I got my signals crossed up somehow. This afternoon I so wanted to toss in the towel and go get a regular nursing job. I was looking through some things on the desk where I was working and picked up a little black picture frame. Inside was this verse; "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans not for calamity, but to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11 Was that just there by accident? Did I just happen to get that little reminder for no reason? I don't think so. Next week I'll go back for round two of wading through the mud, and pray for me. I need those prayers.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Weird Thursday Truly

This is without doubt the weirdest first week on a job, that I have ever experienced. Strange is the word. Red flag here, red flag there, good day, bad day, weird day, no rosy honeymoon time with these folks. I'm just trying to put it together. What has happened before to loose this staff, and um excuse me, TWICE. We shall see.

My friend said she felt like selling her toddlers to the gypsies. I would've loved it myself, even when I was a little girl. My favorite dress up was a gypsy or a pirate,great fun, no costume in a box for those!

In honor of all frustrated mothers.
I will sing you a little song.
you must imagine the tune unless I find one on u tube.

Today is the day
we give babies away,
with a half a pound of tea,
so if you know any ladies
who want any babies,
just send them right over to me.

I mooned and I crooned
that little baby a tune
trying to get him to sleep.
And if he doesn't quit soon,
I'm going to hit him with the spoon,
and put him out of my misery.

I learned that in my Single Mothers Support Group it is the only thing I remember; besides finding out that all four year olds skip the wiping part of potty training.

Cheer up moms!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Celebrating Wednesday!

The first week is almost finished and I think I'm catching on. Until I get this figured out I am going to be putting in some hours! Who said you can't teach an old --- woman new tricks?
I should never post when I'm tired. Ya'll know I can't spell but shoot fire, advertising it like that on the WWW is too much.
I successfully worked a referral from intake to admission. My boss smiled at me and said he thought I was catching on quickly. Guess what, that brought a SMILE to my face! Learning a job this different is really,..... well scary. Once I know what I'm doing it will be fine. Just like anything else, I hate being a beginner.

I'm really trying to catch up on my favorite blogs. Getting used to getting up at 6am and getting home at 6pm is a 12 hr/8hr day. Does every working woman live like this? Is this women's liberation? Liberation from what? We haven't had dinner this week. I have not figured that part out yet. My hubby said all I have to do is work and sleep, but the family hasn't quite picked up all my jobs yet. Eggs and peanut butter sandwiches only go so far. My mind is trying to wrap around single working moms. That has to be the hardest job out there.

Besides all the regular stuff, one of my cats got hurt. Kathy where are you? Looks like a bite to her rear end. My husband will not take her to the vet he thinks it will heal. I am not so sure. A chunk of hide is separated from where it's supposed to be connected. How can tissue that has never grown fur get a layer of protective skin on it? it is clean and pink and looks good as far as a wound goes, no infection. Thank goodness her little bum hole isn't ripped. Humans can't be stitched up after time has gone by, what about animals? We're using crazy glue in the ER. I can see how it needs to go back together, do I dare? I am SOOOOO not a vet. I hate to even give animals shots. It's superficial as far as the tissues and muscles but the hide is cleanly separated and it's just there. She's walking alright and eating and everything. We're keeping her inside too. OK all you knowledgeable cat owners, suggestions? Please don't tell me to shoot my husband, he grew up on a farm in the country. Farmers think different, and he may be right, it just bothers me.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Saved By The Dog

My baby had hard news today. The kids have a little sister and brother and they have been separated since they came to live with us. It's a long ugly story. Piglet did a lot of mothering to them when they were little. She mailed a birthday card to her little brother and today it came back; undeliverable, no forwarding address. She was devastated.

I followed her outside, I knew she was crying. I just sat by her and stroked her hair and listened. We just sat there together. The dog went over and threw up something, and then went and pooped. We laughed, he's a great dog with good timing.

I came in the house and went upstairs. I've been reading some fun books and resting since I got home. A little while later I heard Piglet say, "Somebody is burning up eggs"! Holy cow! I had COMPLETELY forgotten that I had put some eggs on the stove to hard boil, on high. They had gone bone dry and were exploding all over. The DOG was barking and wouldn't quit. He made Piglet go in the kitchen. Our dog is a hero! We probably could have had a fire. It's official he's a hero and I'm demented.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

A Clinical Liaison

What is a clinical liaison? I'm not exactly sure. What I gathered is it is a multi faceted, multi task, multi skilled; do everything for everybody kind of job that nurses do. One aspect is to assess referrals to see if they are suitable for an LTAC- long term acute care, length of stay about a month. These patients are SICK! Many will be on ventilators or have multiple wounds. They are people who are exhausting their stay at the hospital= run out of eligible funds. They are people that with more time and good care may get better.

That means dealing with families who are grief stricken and upset. It means dealing with doctors, nurses, case managers, and entire health care teams to find the best solution for these patients to get what they need. It means making everybody happy as much as possible. The challenges are to have the right answer when the hospital is trying to dump a bad candidate on you, and have them still continue to refer. Another challenge will be with families, if their loved one is so sick why do they have to move? And another scenario, most of these patients are sick enough to have about a 50% chance of recovery. Sometimes hospice will be better. Selling a "no" is probably the toughest but in hospice care you learn to say no often, gently. I have worked in hospice.

I will be one of the faces that represents the facility. I'll be recruiting with other health care personnel and facilities to let them know what we can do for their patients. It's sales, service, and health care all intermingled, lots of pieces and parts.

I just hope I will be good at it. I can be dumb for a smart girl, sometimes. Dumb with reading people between the lines and politics. I am very literal and straight forward. I can miss the upset person that is smiling at you and ready to get your job yanked. I've learned and am much better at it, but there is still the occasional unpleasant surprise.

The perks are great. I get to work Monday-Friday during the daytime. There is no CALL. I'll have a company phone, have to dress up pretty, and travel around, mileage reimbursed. I will be on a salary. When our team performs well we will get bonuses! Look out Colombia my whole family is coming! I won't ever be in a boring routine. I get to solve problems. I get to help people through a decision crisis and establish good relationships with everybody. I think it's perfect for me and I'm really nervous about doing well. But I can do all things through HIM who gives me strength.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

A Wowie Amazing Day

For a long time I have heard the expression, "You can't out give God." Meaning that God is never indebted to any person it is easy for him to just blow blessings over you, any time. Not to dig up the whole contrast of suffering, at least right now. Trust me I have been on that end of the spectrum too and discovered gifts wrapped in pain. But tonight this is about joy and miraculous events that can not be attributed to anything else; it's a blessing from God!

I may have mentioned that I have been job hunting. You would think with nursing like it is that jobs would be overflowing, they are if you want to work lousy hours and kill yourself. I had actually interviewed in several places. Before I left for Colombia I had discussed with a manager a night position in oncology. It was a 12 hour shift position that required 3 shifts a week. There were some pluses to that position. I know those doctors well. I established a good repore with the manager who is a Christian and had a like philosophy towards health care as a healing ministry. I really thought that was it.

The question in my mind was, how and I mean literally HOW would I be able to work 12 hour night shift work? It was bothering me, because in my mind I couldn't imagine that going very well. Which brings me to the miracle part of my story. I had an appointment today at 1pm for a pre employment physical too accept the night shift position. At 11:30 I received a call from another hospital that I had interviewed at. A cheery voice that I recognized asked me if I was still available. I replied that I was pretty close to a job and my physical was scheduled today.
She said, "Well, I'd like to offer you a clinical liaison position that I think you'd be really good at.
She might as well have said, "You won the lottery!" Because I basically lost it. My very professional appropriate response was hopelessly lost at the moment because out of my mouth flew phrases like this. Oh my God are you serious? Your not joking,REALLY? Wow, and then back to Oh my God, again. I shouldn't tell but you know that part of my blogging is to tell the truth, just give it to you straight, no sugar coating nuttin.

I went. The person who had taken my resume out and placed it on the MAN'S desk, and had told him to consider me for this type of work. Now I had to interview again, not only that but figure out what the job is, and in an hour before my physical appointment. Decisions were going to be made fast today. So he explained, I listened, asked good questions, did not, HEAR this, interrupt! Praise Jesus let the Hallelujah chorus begin. What he said was making sense and it sounded like something I really would like to do.

Then we hit a snag, he wanted to wait to give me an offer.
I told him I couldn't do that. So I asked him,"What do you need to hear from me to be comfortable to close this deal? He didn't answer. He got the clinical director to come and give his spiel. They decided to offer me the job, then, as in now. I went downstairs and apologized for missing my physical appointment and relayed the job offer. They wanted to try and keep me, but didn't pad up my salary so it wasn't too hard of a call. Something new and exciting in an advanced practice roll with a great starting salary versus graveyard shifts that are 12 hours long. Sorry no contest.
It gets better. They need another person to be on this team and I know somebody whose looking. She would be fabulous at this. I love working with her. So I told them her name and what she used to do and said she was looking. He's got 3 applicants for Friday, so she needs to jump on it now. We will see.

So if I wasn't so decrepit from the fanny slapping, I might have tried to flip a cartwheel. Because people this is some exciting news! On a slightly quieter note it is a little scary, but I think I can do it and do it well. I hear that chorus again.

To celebrate I thought I'd show you the lunch we ate in a 5 star hotel in Cartegena. It was simply superb, Divine and delish. Just the memory brings up a festive occasion.

My friend summed it up like this," Are you telling me, that you got a job as a clinical liaison in one day and you didn't even apply for the position?" Exactly. That's God.

Beautiful isn't it? We just suffered sitting there enjoying delicious Colombian coffee, looking at those balconies full of bougainvillea, and of course our sweet interpreter Who is very easy on the eyes; and was wonderful gentlemanly entertainment. He had the courage of a lion to take three women shopping for the day, without his wife! All in the name of ministry. Which truthfully it was since we couldn't go without him. We had a lot of fun. Little did I know what was in store for me next, a very big