Saturday, February 14, 2009
A Philosophizing Morning
Philosophizing, that is not a word but it works doesn't it? We woke up to gray skies and cold weather after it getting so warm that I almost took the blankets off the bed. I know better now. I have lived here long enough to remember that when it's hot just kick the covers off, don't pack them up till the end of March. It takes an adult learner in my age group 5 or 6 repetitions at least to learn something new. I can remember, when I could learn much faster than that. Not any more.
Which are the thoughts that led me down a little rabbit trail. We have been in Mississippi for 8 years now. It has taken us that long for me to make the house a home. It has taken this long to learn my way around more than my immediate neighborhood, and develop some sense of direction for where I am going. It has taken this long to establish good friendships with people we really care about. During this time we have also aged more. My husband is in his early seventies. I am in the throes of menopause where mental clarity and sleep deprivation are big issues. We are maybe not as adaptable to change as we once were. I can't see being able to get the husband to move into a different neighborhood locally much less a huge move into a different area. So this is it. Any coping with the changes in this world are going to have to be done right here. Bloom where you are planted. It scares me. I like having an escape plan. In reality, it's probably already to late. If we didn't have the girls we could move about 30 minutes away from where we are and be in the country, but that won't work with the kids. It's too late to introduce them to the country life.
The country life led me down another rabbit trail. There are a lot of things I would do differently if I was raising kids again. I think about Heidi and the Milkman and how they are raising their boys quite often. Their children play and have fun but they also have chores. They are learning to work right now. Their ten year old son knows how to help a cow give birth. I don't know about you, but I am impressed with that. If that ten year old boy happened upon an emergency on the side of some road some where, and a woman was giving birth he could help out. He would know more what to do than most adults. I would guess that kids raised on a farm grow up not only knowing how to work, but grow up expecting to work. I can't see them wondering what kind of a career would bring them the most fulfillment in life. Really that is a lot of bunk.
Piglet wants to go to a college that costs 15,000 a year. She hasn't put forth any effort to look into scholarships or financial aide. She really doesn't have a goal in mind. I'm not seeing it happen. She works, saves, and spends money on eating out, and whatever she wants. I don't see her really thinking about how to make this college thing happen. I may be wrong but my husband and I were talking about this today. If the parents don't have a plan, the kids don't have a plan. If the parents don't raise the kids to work from the time they are very young, they don't expect to have to work. If we let them play when they are young ninety percent of the time, they don't really expect life to be different when they are grown. Both of our girls fuss about the "time for myself" that means doing what they want to do. That's the way I raised them. I let them play a lot. I wanted them to be happy. I wanted them to experience life and climb trees and make mud pies. I did and they did. They were happy children. Those things are good. But somewhere in there I should have also taught them to work, more than just making their beds and cleaning. I just didn't think about that.
If you think about schools and colleges in terms of business, they are in the business of having students. They are not in the business of producing people who work. My experience in college was that teachers advise you to continue in education. That's how they get a pay check.
I went to a local junior college for a lot of years and didn't accomplish anything. I just kept signing up for class and getting my financial aide. I went to junior college as a kid for 6 years. I'm embarrassed to tell you that. If I could do it so can other people. I wasn't trying to exploit the system. I was young and didn't know what I wanted to do. No one offered me any other suggestion than to "explore my options." When I finally got tired of that I went to cosmetology school for one year to get a trade and get a job. I became a nurse much later in life.
So what's the point? I'm not sure, because I am philosophizing this morning. I am thinking about the scary stuff in government. I am thinking that the world as I know it, is going to change and never be the same. I am thinking about these girls and am not so sure they are ready to do make it. I wish I lived on a farm and had taught my girls to pitch hay, ride horses, and marry farmers.
My girls will make good wives and mothers. That is truly what I prepared them for.
What about you? Are these times causing you to reflect about your life? Are you uncertain about the direction of this country? Can your family ride out a depression if/when we go broke? Do you know how to survive without all the modern conveniences? Does borrowing a trillion dollars from foreign countries make you feel vulnerable and exposed? What do you think?
On a lighter note...
A friend of mine Angela says what she thinks, and apparently she thinks a lot of me, enough to give me a special friend award with these words.
"These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.”!
Wow Happy Valentines Day. If you would like this award feel free to pick it up and give it away. It's a great day to share some love.
My 8+ choices include but in no way are limited to these. I don't like picking up a non specific reward, it's embarrassing to me, but if you want it you can take it! You have to put those lovely complimentary words in your post for others.
6. grandma j.
8. Rosie Kate
10. PEACH and MJ.
11. and you, yes you.