Sweet Adeline is getting ready to leave us. Wednesday began in the ordinary way with our usual routine of bath day. After breakfast she was accelerating into another place. I have seen this before but I always marvel how those who aren't medicated seem to see into the afterlife while they are still here. Whatever she was looking at was making her want to get up and go.
We have been so careful helping her to sit and to walk and on this day she wasn't needing any help! If I didn't have her up to the table she would have stood up and gone some where. I asked her where she was going and she said, "Somewhere else from here"! Bless her heart she saw angels and spoke wildly all that day and all night lone until Thursday morning. Then she was just quiet and worn out and she quit eatting. Friday when I came she couldn't get up, didn't want to eat, and appeared to be actively dying.
We called the doctor and arranged for hospice to come to the house. They will provide a lot of support and they handle the details of the death so gently. It will be better with them involved. Last night I stayed with her all night in my recliner lounger, listening to her breathe and praying.
There are so many parallels to birth in death. I felt like a new mother does listening to her newborn breathe. I was listening too. Awake and ready if she became distressed or the breathing stopped. Neither happened she had a quiet night. It seems her leaving slowed down for now. Her other daughter arrives today and I think she is waiting for her.
Last night her grandson and his wife came over and after they left she woke up and her eyes returned to clear blue from the opaque cloudiness they had become. She gazed into my face and then her daughters going back and forth between us giving us both so much of her love in those sweet tender smiles. She is amazing. What a testimony to be so full of grace and trust. She said to me," I don't understand this," and one tear rolled down the side of her cheek tearing into my heart. I told her, 'You said you want to go to Jesus, isn't that right"? She answered, "Yes". I continued, "That's what's happening your getting ready to go, and we will be right her taking care of you just like always". That settled it for her. She was reassured enough to relax and go back to sleep. A sleep of trusting.
I wonder if I will ever be able to give up control like that. I am told she was quite a controlling person in her day so there is HOPE.
There is hope today for her going home. We will miss her. We all did our share of crying as the realization of what was happening set in. But God who is able to keep us in perfecr peace is doing His job.