Confessions of a Gardener

Last years garden

Weed free turned over and ready for planting

After it had been growing for  a little while.

This year the same space.

 This is my garden bed. A mass of weeds and zinnias, more weeds than anything else. Any pictures you have seen have been from prior years. THIS is the real deal.

 A struggling Iris .

 Crabgrass taketh over the whole earth starting with my rock wall.

 This is just the edge of the bed.

 Trees sprouting up and briar's.

 Not all is lost we actually began a bit of clean up and started cleaning up the side yard. My hunny doesn't like working in the yard alone and neither do I so we began. Inch by inch with lots of breaks. I wish I would have taken a before picture. I am a bit out of the habit of thinking about blog posting.

 I do want to get back into it however.

 I like this area it's nearly no maintenance it's so full of vinca.

 The salvia comes up by itself.

 The bugs come just as quickly. Go away you filthy maggot!!

 As do these other plants. This is what is called having good bones. The faithful perennials that just come up and look lovely.

 Just a bit of the clean up.

 This actually needs a lot of work but from a distance the "bones" look pretty.

 Up close it looks like a big weed job.

Little spider in a web.

 And then we have a digger- Sammy goes around with a perpetual dirty nose he loves to dig for truffles. This behavior does not help the back yard, not one teensy little iota. How you spell iota?

 The promise of beauty that comes after winter. The don't need anything that doesn't happen naturally.

 Plants that can survive the thorns, the weeds, and neglect. I know they are grateful they told me.

 Ready to bloom with just a little help. I'd like to dig these up and move them back, we will see.

 The panting, sweating, over weight and very out of shape, gardener pauses to capture some beautiful light. To notice not just what is overwhelmingly in a state of neglect but what is strong and beautiful.
Or is that the light I'll see as I am about to die?

Good hard scape, good bones, rich soil full of fat earth worms and perennials that refuse to succumb; although puffing and weak I am encouraged. This garden is actually a word picture of my life. My life that has been full of weeds, encroaching thorns and briar's. But with care and inch by inch I am returning. I have not succumbed or died, not yet anyway, check back next week.  Today I am here and each day has a bit more strength a bit more encouragement, definitely more fat. You stay in bed for a month and see what happens.  It was a big deal at first just to stay awake. Some people will use any excuse to stay in bed.  I was so tired I couldn't stay awake yeah yeah yeah yadda yadda yadda. Underneath the dead grass that I pulled up, is good rich soil and fat earth worms working on the promise of better days. The restoration of health, beauty, and strength. Well, maybe not beauty, wait am I talking about me or the yard? Do you know? Am I confused?

A friend came by today and said, "Inch by inch it's a cinch, yard by yard it's hard." Little by little we will pull weeds and give the seeds a chance to sprout.  There are so many seeds and roots in this yard I don't need to plant anything. If we just clean up something will happen. When we provide the right environment for growth and health, it happens. It's happening for me. Spring has come and the hard winter has passed. We are coming back, that would be the yard and myself.  Just to be clear on that.

Newsflash Mine and Ours

It's been a challenging week.

We have some tax issues to straighten out and THAT is NEVER easy or welcome.

I am having struggles with a granddaughter and her choices.  When our adult kids blame us our our beliefs for their problems instead of owning their part in it; well it's just ugly. Warts warts warts.
Family pain isn't over until we are dead.

On the other hand our other granddaughters are bringing us joy!

There have been a lot of hot topics in the news that have just made me hoppin mad.
Legislature against parents having their kids work on the family farm. I do not buy the argument about migrant workers kids. This is just one more freedom being grabbed. Besides farmers are about the last group of folks still instilling a good work ethic in their kids. A blanket statement yes, but most people are more interested in PROVIDING for their kids then teaching them to work.

Think about it. Lessons, games, activities, friends over, play dates, etc.... but how about chores?
Please tell me your teaching your kids to work. It will restore my faith in America.
What do you have them do?
All our kids have a strong work ethic. They always had to help and weren't allowed to just play all the time. Their weren't any games then either unless they came in a box. Children had to interact with each other which is a whole nutha subject.

Next up was a video clip about a woman facing 3 months in jail if convicted for planting a vegetable garden in her front yard. I about had a stroke. THINK about the progression of what is happening in our country. First it is politically correct speech, now politically correct YARDS?

I am beginning to think that any kind of work, ingenuity, or independent thinking and problem solving is facing an executioners block. What happened to private property? Seriously we have to conform on this level?




What do you think? Is this still the home of the brave and the land of the free? I doubt if this would be happening in Texas, maybe not Mississippi depending on where. I think her yard is lovely plus the kids in her neighborhood are learning where food comes from.

I thought we working on more community food projects and gardens and better use of land and resources. This is insanity.


I wish I had some nice raised beds like hers that is one of the best ways to garden. Any pictures of my yard are from last year not how it looks now. I could use a crew of workers to weed and loosen my soil. Neither of us has had any pep left over for yard work. Never thought I'd see the day.

I've been thinking about ordering Nutrisystems or something that could be delivered so I don't have to shop or cook. The price is really cheap right now. I still don't do much but I'm getting better slowly. My doctor told me that when your not in your twenties you don't bounce back fast.
Nice....maybe I don't bounce at all. Maybe I just lie there.

The heat has turned up, had to close the windows and turn on the AC. The windows have been open for a couple of months and it has been wonderful. Ilove fresh air and fans. We really got a break on our utility bills too.I used to ask Jim how the weather "knows" when we change the calendar! May gets hot from now until October. The rest of the year is awesome so we have our pluses.

The good news.
Both the poodas have new haircuts and look gorgeous. They feel good too very frisky.

A friend won  3 months of free membership at a local health club and gave it to me. WOWZAS
she wanted me to have it for my rehab. A couple more weeks and I'll start. I can't risk breathing anything right now or being exposed to any ones illnesses. It is something nice to look forward too.

I'm going to limit or maybe quit FB so I post more. There is only so much time in the day. I can waste a lot of time on FB and never post. I used to notice that other people who blogged and then went on FB quit posting, and now I have done it too! I'd rather blog and read blogs.

My writing is sloppy and if I blog more my writing skills will improve. There has to be more in life than random.

I'm trying to sew again, read again, cook again and write again.
Not to mention cleaning exercising, laundry, dogs, and gardening which have ALL fallen by the wayside.
Hey that must mean I am alive!!
It at least means that I want to do more than comment on FB half the day. Your probably much more disciplined than I am.

Go ahead and sound off what do you think?

Do I Blog?

 Easter came and went. I was sick but I had done a little bit of decorating before I went on my trip. I had planned to show you my spring festivity. You know how plans go when they are made by me. My middle name is Murphy, my first name is Daffy and so here you have a few dainties to look at if your so inclined. If not scroll down, there are dog photos just to make sure this isn't a total bust.

 I love love love this wittle wabbit. Wabbits ain't posed to be green but he's got his chamo on so that he can blend in. All that chub was so cute not to mention cockeyed ears. What is it about goofy ears that just slays me deader than a door nail? I dunnno.

 This is the best time of year at my house. I definitely have the spring fling going on outside. There is so much more but year after year don't you get tired of seeing the same bushes? The same roses, clematis and all the other spring happies that are planted here on my plot in the south, would you really like to see them AGAIN?

 I found a real birds nest from last year and brought it in the house. It still has some soft tufts in it. It is a well constructed nest if your knowledgeable about birds you can tell us what kind of bird built it.

 I'm having a thing for birds this year. It started with the picture my friend gave me. Then I had to work at making the whole mantel have some of these colors so one bird led to another.

     Can you see the butterfly? It's so cool it's made out of paper and the wings move like a real one. They are all attached separately, I am easily amused.

 This was taken in Western Asia. I was sick as stink in this picture I could hardly breathe which is why there is a big glass of tea, honey and lemons on the table. It was such a great street, loved everything there. Realized I was sitting right next to a pharmacy (see the sign in the background? e big red E and PH) and went over there ASAP bought some prednisone, swallowed handfuls of it, which may have kept me alive. You know if you aren't breathing there is the possibility of becoming fertilizer in the near future...just sayin.

This is a good picture of the streets, the old cobblestones, the lights and how clean everything is.

This young man was so charming and cute. I wasn't dead I noticed he is cute.  He is from South Africa and he was taking a break from his whirlwind tour of Europe and Asia; he is producing a reality show for TV. He will be marketing it when they finish. He explained his idea is something along the lines of the Amazing Race but with rock bands.
He was so great at conversation a little bright spot in the day. Not to mention he took the only picture of me on my trip.
My friend managed to keep a good dialogue going while I barked like a seal. I had every intention of remembering his name in case he makes the big time on TV but I have forgotten. It's a good thing I can't remember all that I forget.

Moving on since this is a rambling kind of a post a bit of this and that.
Dog updates.

Sammy then all 24 skinny pounds of him.

Sammy now, he's 35 pounds of love.

  

  Look at how great Sammy looks. He was so pathetic when I got him he was about 4 inches wide he was so thin. He has filled out and grown and looks to be all poodle now. There is no way of knowing but he has plenty of poodle and he has a sweet intelligent look about him now. He's my spoiled rotten baby.

and then....

 This is monstro the grande pooda bear-- Romano is el grando and big hearted he lets Sammy have everything first. Sammy is spoiled rotten, Roman is the big daddy. They have no idea they are dawgs really not even the first clue.

 There is ALMOST room for me on the bed with them both up here. I'm not complaining I like their company. They have been good nurses for this long bout of bletch, bark, cough, hack, sputter, wheeze, sneeze and snort.

Roman likes to watch dog out the window. He 's such the guard dog he is ALWAYS on duty. He cruises the perimeter of our property and watches out the windows and sleeps by the front door. Ain't nutin gettin past him no sirrreeeebob not on that bad boys watch.

It's kinda funny how we get different kinds of dogs and how they reflect us. I never thought I'd have this big humongous pooda bear and my brother who has had all kinds of dogs and done police work with trained police dogs has a 5 pound Chihuahua. That's about how it goes with our lives everything is so stinkin logical! OF course my brother has a 5 pound dog, a 5 pound dog will not eat you out of house and home or fill your yard with cow patties. No a 5 pound dog will love you and act like a 100 pound dog at a fraction of the price and that my friends is good business. When your dog weighs 5 pounds you can do other things, like taking little darlin girls out for a ride on Granddaddy's big boy bike. Yeah that's my brother, and the littlest peanut to be added to his pack.

I never have had a head for business.
My yard is full of pooda pies and I suppose I still blog.

The Trip to Turkey

 Travelling half way across the world takes a long time. It's amazing though once you get there to see the sights. Turkey is a beautiful place, ancient and very clean.

 I loved the coastal waters. The bridges, the gates and the amazing architecture.

 My lungs however did not fare well with the smoking. I missed the day in Ephesus, the shopping trip to the Grand Bazaar and a whole host of adventures. My camera would not work even with new batteries, it was the craziest thing.

 Turns out tulips are native from Turkey and they were everywhere. The flowers and gardens were spectacular.

 I could have shopped in the spice bazaar all day. What a plethora of fragrance and beauty. I was so aware of the difference in the freshness and quality of all their foods. Experiencing truly unprocessed foods and spices was the strongest testimony of all to the way we ruin our foods here.

 Making a type of tortilla that they fill with the most amazing goat cheese, spinach or meat, whatever you want. The flavor was fabulous. No one is in a hurry everyone eats and drinks tea for a long relaxing amount of time.

 Isn't it beautiful?

The square and many of the streets are made of cobblestones. Most people use public transportation which is very fast, efficient and cheap. Most of the streets are full of people walking not driving.
They clean the streets and everyone keeps everything lovely except for the constant cigarette smoking. Twelve year olds may legally smoke. There are also the large water pipes and the most aromatic pipe smoke ever, it smelled so wonderful I would have liked to taste a puff. Their were little carts of burning/roasting chestnuts everywhere that just billowed an awful stinky smoke.
You would think I could get some fresh air outside but I couldn't. Since I came home I was in the hospital with really bad asthma, worst ever. I'm home in the bed and sick as stink I can't even muster up the effort to shower. But I wanted to say hello and show you a little of where I was. These pictures were taken by a friend on the trip.

I bought some pretty scarves and some wonderful tea. I kept waiting for the grand bazaar day and was to sick to go. So much for shopping. If your currency is the English pound or the Euro definitely go and buy! Our dollar is in deep deep doo doo, I had to pay $7 for a coke in France. That's a reality check.

I'll write again when I feel better. your loved this is the most I have done since I came home.

Leavin on a jet plane....

I have been so busy. I'm going on a trip and for safety reasons will keep our destination private until we return. Five of us will begin a 20 hour trip across the world into a different culture to have an adventure.We will sight see and shop, make friends and walk for miles and miles every day.
It's basically an shop till you drop every day.

Unreal.

I have planned carefully to pack the lightest suitcase ever, 35 pounds! I'm a tad proud about that.
We are praying for sun and that the forcast will change.We will be walking a lot. I am already hot so cooling off will be nice.

My camera is packed and I'm ready to go.I'll have plenty to share when I return.
Until then take care and happy Easter.

love Karen.

Spring Cleaning

 What puts you in the mood for spring?

 Is it seeing the first blossoms or butterflies?

 Finding bird nests?

 Do you love blue eggs?

 I'm not sure how it happened but I did housework yesterday.

 I cleaned, organized and decorated a little bit. I worked at it all day. When I quit I had accomplished a good bit and it felt wonderful. Hurry get the camera for proof before it gets messed up again,

 Finally getting the laundry/crafting room done. Now I have no excuse for not making anything.

 I haven't been sleeping well at night. After all this work I figured that I would really sleep well last night.

 Last night we had severe thunder and lightening storms. Ha ha very funny. Actually it is funny so why am I not laughing? Maybe because I am sleepy?

Roads

It seems to me that I don't do much anymore. I haven't taken my camera out for awhile even though the side of the house has been just full of double narcissus blooms and cilantro. I have so much cilantro this year because it never got cold. The second sprouting which usually gets killed by frost never got killed by frost. My inner rabbit comes out when I walk by and just pinch off a little sprig or two or three and just eat it.

I have been sick for a week. It amazes me how one week can feel like one month but it has only been a week. Last Saturday in the night I felt myself coming down with an ugly bug. I knew it was nothing to mess with. Monday morning at 8am I presented myself at my doctor's office as a walk in. Sometimes it is best to forget playing the game lest you find yourself going directly to hospital and not collecting $200. I don't have any "get out of jail free" cards.

One week later I have red hair because I was bored. It needs some streaks in it. I'll work on that.
My natural hair used to be an auburn light brown color. I have become so used to blond that I feel weird in any other color.

I am using a lot of words to talk about nothing.

If you are still here I am going to talk about what is really on my mind. I guess that is my way of getting the "small talk" out of the way.

I am at a place in my life where I need inspiration and motivation to engage in life again in some meaningful way. I used to blog everyday and now maybe once a month? I used to take pictures, garden, read, write, cook, create....and now?

Well really now I'd just as soon stay in bed. I'm not depressed either, just sick.
Lacking motivation is not depression it's just lacking motivation.

I'm at another crossroads in my life where I have to find something interesting to do.
I do enjoy this jewelry business. It really is fun. The best part is giving the hostess her total in free jewelry. What a company, no one gives like they do. I do enjoy this new business.  I guess I have always liked jewelry. Even as a poor younger woman I could find some money for a beautiful piece of silver. I have always loved bracelets.

 

Now I have gobs of them. I do take the price tags off before wearing them. Minnie Pearl was a one of a kind. I liked her hillbilly style. You do not have to be "cool" for me to like you. Nerds are welcome.

Back to interests. I still love to garden but my body does not. I have lost the bug war. Now in spring which by the way is here already; instead of pouring through the catalogs I imagine the late summer mangled mess of plants grown together sticky with disease and loaded with bugs. That kills any ideas of starting anything. I can't take the disappointment. Twelve years of battling with the bugs of the south and guess what? The bugs win. I can't bring myself to nuclear war. I don't want to win at any cost. Winning with generous quantities of sevin dust is losing the war in my book.
Besides I can't weed enough to justify doing much of anything.  Just like that it happens, the end of a way of life by rationalization.  The gardener is no more.

The children too have left the nest. I'd actually like to shrink the nest to keep the fledglings flying. We are at a point in life where it's nice for it to be just the 2 of us.
 

Plus dogs. Sammy will not be left out all 35 pounds of him, Lil Sampson.

I love the dogs. Roman is having all kinds of issues he has skin allergies and he chews himself into a MESS. It isn't food because I have tried all kinds of grain free diets and changed his proteins. He's just itchy and then he gets infected and GAH what a MESS!!!! We went to the vet AGAIN yesterday for his legs and really he is just pitiful.  I have a friend out in Colorado Springs that has 2 poodles. If she decides she wants him I'm going to let her have him. She has a good job and could keep up with the vet visits. I wonder too if he changes his climate if he will do better? Sampson is enough dog for me.
He is my baby, and his cuteness factor is off the Richter scale. It helps that he eats 2 cups of dog food a day. Going through 6 cups of dog food a day is just plain expensive.

The kids took the cats so if Roman goes west it  will be me and you and a dog named .....travelling and living off the land?

I want to find a beach town. I'd like to go back to Santa Cruz.
Really
I want to go back.
I shop on Zillow all the time.
We could get a mobile home.
Heck I'd sign up for HUD and wait for housing for the old folks.
I want to grow the plants that grow near the Pacific.
Lobelia and lots of it, Roses of Sharon, lillie's, roses, fuchsia's begonias.....
I can see them all scattered together in my mind...the blues, purples, pinks and varieties of green foliage.
Having a house doesn't matter to me so much anymore. We came out here to own a home and live cheap. We have owned a home. It's more like the home owns us.
I just don't need it anymore.
I really don't want it anymore.

California has been singing to me.
My husband isn't hearing it. He's happy I think.
I don't know how he can stand being away from his grand kids.

Now that is something we are both very good at.
We know how to be grandparents.

Saturdays in Santa Cruz the farmers market will be busy. The farmers market there is a sensory overload of beauty. Flowers, vegetables, fresh baked goods, wines, a plethora of gorgeousness to tantalize all ones senses. It's an experience.

I loved taking my granddaughters to the farmers market.
I'd like to take MM to the market. She is 5 years old now.
She is at just the right age to enjoy walking around and shopping, thinking about dinner and what would taste good.

I just realized how long this post is getting. I don't have any way of wrapping it up either. There is no wrap up. It's not settled.

I'm at another crossroads. Which way will WE go?