Wednesday, July 8, 2009

? PS

A little clarification is in order. I really don't think I am being negative. I'm being realistic and scared. The technicians saw "something" that warranted further study. They are tech's not radiologists so they can't diagnose. I am not thinking that I have cancer. I don't have any symptoms of cancer. I certainly haven't had any unexplained weight loss. Cancer would be a surprise for sure. It could happen because cancer can present without anything but fatigue and I do have plenty of that, but I am NOT thinking that.

What I think is that I have avascular necrosis (Google it) in my joints from taking way too many steroids when I had a lot of asthma. That will be bad enough. What unnerves me is how many joints and how many bones are deteriorating and how bad? The tests I had done yesterday will help determine that and also "stage" the deterioration.

Remember I work with doctors and sick people. I have always said that if I ever got cancer or something really ugly I'd just live until I died. I don't believe in the medicine that I help practice. Everything has a price and it's hefty. So now the rubber hits the road. Besides if it was cancer my phone would have already been ringing.


LDF said...

Oh, my dear! how frightening -- especially when you are a nurse and have that kind of "inside" knowledge! i'm sure there's nothing i can say that will make it all better, but please know -- even though we don't really know each other -- that my thoughts and prayers are with you! Hugs!

Grandma Tillie's Bakery said...

Calm down and get somewhere quiet where you can talk to your Daddy--He made you and He knows what you are facing.

My mom is in the very same boat as we speak with unexplained problems and waiting for a big test on Friday. I cannot face the possibility that it is something deadly.

Please don't verbalize anything but POSITIVE.

I will be praying for you everytime I pray for my Mom, which is A LOT.

{{{{Big Hugs}}}}

Unknown said...

Leave all the worrying in the hands of the doctors for now. Praying for your healing.

farmlady said...

The rubber hasn't hit the road yet. Slow down and tell the "nurse inside of you" to wait for a diagnoses. Pain is jerking you around and you're scared.
Please try to remember that what ever this is, your panic and worry will not change it. You have a lot of people thinking good thoughts for you.

Lynne's Somewhat Invented Life said...

Okay, I looked up avascular necrosis and holy heck, don't go there. Your body knows how to heal itself, even replace dead bone. Let it do it. Believe in the power of God. And know that many people are praying for you. Including me.

And may you find the peace the Savior can bring. Let him take your worry.

I hope this doesn't offend you in any way.

Annie said...

Karen, I had no idea you had such problems...have reread some of your previous posts ...regarding those boots you have to horrible in the summer...but still if they help you get around...

Take care, thinking of you

noble pig said...

Yes you know too much...I live with someone who does too. It makes every symptom a scary one. I hope all is well. Don't take a break, I want to see the bread.

Mental P Mama said...

No news is always good news. Take good care. xoxo, Lauren

Ruth Marie Hunter said...

Hi there!!

I am so sorry you are having so much trouble. I hope and pray you get a good report Friday so you can get back out in the yard and work in your flowers and garden.I just got through putting up corn.