Thursday, April 3, 2008

When Life Throws Us A Curve Ball

It's 10:45 in the morning and I am still in my pajamas. Pajamas comfort me when I'm moody. Leaving the girls loose, and the feet barefooted, it helps and I'm not sure why. This morning I woke up in a struggle, wishing for a bridge to jump off of. Not really, it's just an expression, but I was focusing on my circumstances which at the moment are not good. When you tangle with piranha you might get eaten. I can't go back to work until we get a mess straightened out, and that is depressing. Not to mention scary. It doesn't matter if I was right or wrong, when there is no paycheck. I never have been good at eating crow and I didn't. Now I am in a position of dependence on the Lord to deliver me from my enemy.
It doesn't help that this month I spent more money than I should have, way to much. Now I have the worry of the bills and the lack of funds, solution is to stay in my pajamas. Actually what I should do is activate my agency job and just get some shifts in. Now there's an idea.

I'm working through a study called "Experiencing God, Knowing and Doing the Will of God," by Henry Blackaby. Instead of the bridge I thought it would be more constructive to read today's study and see if I could have an attitude adjustment. Have you ever wondered HOW to know what God wants you to do? He doesn't arrive in burning bushes that don't burn up anymore, at least not lately, so how do we know?
I think I make everything in life more complicated than it has to be. My approach would be a hit and miss deal, I'll try this and if it works then God must be blessing it. Like a blind man groping about looking for a seeing eye dog. Don't think that's it. Like I said before, I relate to sheep.

The suggestion by Blackaby is so simple and right that I can't believe I never thought of it myself. "Work where God is already working." If we ask God to open our spiritual eyes to see and then look for where He is, that is it. When he shows us what He is already up to then we know we are invited to put our hand to the plow. Right there. Now think about our possible responses to this. I'm not qualified. Ask somebody else. I can't possibly do that. (Like sell everything and take 7 kids to Africa) That's not my gift. I don't have time. I don't like working with .....fill it in, kids, old people, or whatever.

OK so now we know we all have a lot in common with Moses at least his first conversation about being the deliver of Israel. What is totally cool is that Moses was right about himself. Everything he stated about his own personal inadequacies was right, he forgot his temper at the moment. Did God care? Did God NEED a together individual to do the work? Did God ever choose a together individual to do a work? No one except Jesus, he has a category of his own the God/man. Humans on the other hand are only required to follow, only asked to be willing, only need to love, and listen. Lord open our spiritual eyes to see, and our hearts to love.

"I am the LORD your God,
who brought you up out of Egypt. (the world)
Open wide your mouth and I will fill it. (ever fed a baby?)
But my people would not listen to me;
(Karen) Israel would not submit to me.
So I gave them over to their stubborn hearts ( who me?)
to follow their own devices. ( but I thought,...)
If my people would but listen to me, (alright)
if (Karen) Israel would follow my ways,
how quickly would I subdue their enemies (mean supervisors)
and turn my hand against their foes!" PS. 81:10-14
Do you think maybe God knew what was going on in my life today? Do you think if God puts His hand on my problem that it will remain a mess? It will never cease to amaze me how often my focus is on myself and what my situation is. I just don't get it. I always need to be reminded. When I focus on God, my whole perspective changes even while the circumstances have not, not yet; and I always marvel every time just like it has never happened before. It's a baaaaahhhhh thing.
But God is like that. He doesn't quit us when we act stupid. He doesn't even remember our dumb stuff. He casts it as far as the east is from the west. His love is so big, we just don't get it. He tells us to open big because His plan is to fill us up not just give us a sliver or a bite.
OK so to apply, while in these nice loose pink pj's, I'll spend some time on my knees and ask the Lord for deliverance, forgiveness, and thank him for the reminder that He is the same God yesterday, today, and forever. It's not about me, it's about Him and that is something to be happy and grateful about. I'm so glad the closest bridge was at the lake in shallow water.


Anonymous said...

Awwww... you wooly sheep you! Great post. I will be praying for you and the difficult situation at work!

Laura ~Peach~ said...

yeah! i totally agree ... and yeah i may end up calling you this coming week as when i do without internet for a spell i tend to use up those cell minutes:-)

MaBunny said...

Hope everything works out for you. I try to live by "let go, let God".
It is very hard sometimes, but he does work:))

Love ya,

Hope all comes out well