In third grade we had an eyesight screening at school. It was the first time I had my eyes tested and I couldn't see anything. I had to walk up closer to the chart to see the big E. No one could figure out how come my grades weren't suffering. Well, that was an easy explanation. To avoid the hazards of the playground and there were many; I went up to the blackboard at recess so I could see what was written. It made me into an auditory learner. By the time I got my first pair of glasses and realized leaves were not just on the ground but also on trees, I was a hopeless klutz. The only time I ever caught a ball I was swinging my arms in right field and the ball just miraculously landed in my mitt. Of course I pretended that I did it on purpose. No one believed it I was as branded, as the Scarlett Letter, but with a *G* for geek.
My grandmother wanted to send me to charm school to practice walking with a book on my head and learn how to suck my stomach in. My mom put about a pound of real butter into every meal. I was not an obese kid, but there was no way I wanted to learn how to suck in my stomach all the time. I wonder what would have happened if mom would have made me go. Maybe I'd be a southern belle of the gardeners tea society. Nah,..charm school wouldn't do anything for the way that I think. That's a whole separate issue, as in topic. I did have half a dozen ballet classes. At first I hated it. Then one magical day a "big" girl as in grown, or impressive, or taller, than me; took my arm and virtually flew me around in the circle and a miracle occurred. I was doing it right! It was fun! Dancing was exhilarating! In the car I could hardly contain myself, and Mom said my classes were finished, I wasn't going back. Bummer. I still dream of being a ballerina. I don't like the tutu poodle prancing steps. The swooping graceful swishy dresses just had me enthralled. How could anyone be so graceful or move like their feet didn't even touch the ground? It was even better than silent Indians that could sneak up on you. Swooping ballerinas, that was cool.
The one time in junior high that I went horse back riding with my friends we went to some place that had trails. My horse pulled some trick to make my saddle slip. We hadn't gone 50 feet before I fell off. He then stepped smack tab on my foot and I was just standing there screaming until I finally pushed him off. I didn't know you could push a horse. I did not get back on. Chicken. Big pansy chicken, cluck cluck.
When in college I learned to swim. I took two swim classes in a row and told the coach it was the last chance, do or die. He said I'd learn and I did. I became a good swimmer but never could build up any breath. Didn't know I had asthma. Then we went on to bicycles. Now that, I loved. Solo sports were awesome. It begins and ends with you. I ended up totally nuts about speed bikes and covering miles and miles of road. When I got divorced I stupidly also divorced my bike, it was his idea. Now that was dumber than dirt. It made sense at the time.
Contact lenses transformed my self confidence. Retiring the Clark Kent look, I boldly went where I had not gone before and quit being a nerd. Even my brothers would say, "Sis you were so cool". However the stress of this was just too much and now in my happy golden years of middle age I have reverted once again to glasses, Clark Kent, Buddy Holly, and not holding my stomach in. If only I could type like Clark Kent.